Okay, so let’s unpack this thing (for those of you who haven’t been around in a couple of days, you need to read this before proceeding with this post). I’ll start with the four fabrications:

• I have always taken great pride in being a brunette, so I have never dyed my hair blonde.
• I did not write for The Tiger, but I sure do wish I had.
• I am not writing a book and don’t really aspire to. Well, I take that back; I would like to but I have no idea what it would be about…
• I don’t think I will ever teach another day in an English classroom. Don’t get me wrong, I loved it. I just never figured out how to manage the paper load. I do think I will work, but I’m not sure what I want to be when I grow up…

So, now let’s turn some attention on the things that are true. I have to add my own disclaimer, though I was quite wayward as a high school and college student, not one of these experiences involved the consumption of libations of any sort.

• I always wanted braces and got them right after Chris and I were married.
• I woke up from having my wisdom teeth removed in the drive-thru of the CVS at Cashua and Second Loop. Ms. Ruby’s animals were still frequent fixtures at the newly opened store at that point.
• My dad, my five year-old sister, and I were in the truck when I wrecked it. We all walked away with a scratch a piece. We were not buckled and there was a loaded rifle in the truck with us (you know, that’s just how we roll in Marion…). It is only now that I fully realize God’s protection on that day; He is too good to me. I could’ve gotten my license before 17, but I was just too afraid after that.
• My mom is hard core, man. She did make me stand in the corner and wash all the dishes, but she rocks!
• In the school fundraiser, teachers were auctioned off. The highest bidder was allowed to pie their teacher. Two of my students got into a bidding war, and I went as the most expensive teacher (not sure that’s a compliment at all). That really was quite fun!
• The underclassmen egged our senior Halloween party and I caught one in the eye. There is a picture of me walking into the building in our senior yearbook with a caption that says, “Cookie is eggcited to be here today!” I love that…
• I did fall all the way down at the prom 🙁 The whole evening was quite harrowing, really.
• “When a man loves a woman….” sniff, sniff. Sad but true…
• Jumpin’ J’s can hook you up with some chicken livers! I know it’s gross, and I don’t care…
• After I got the fake nails, I loved to walk around the classroom and tap on my students’ desks. So fun! I kept them until we had to make room in the budget for a baby, and the acrylics had to go.
• We had so much goofy fun in Marion! One of my friends was a cheerleader, and she had four or five different uniforms. One night all of us dressed up in a uniform and went cruisin’ a nearby town. All of the uniforms were very different (same color scheme), but we totally passed off that we were all MHS cheerleaders. We even went out into the grassy part of the town square and started building pyramids. We also climbed our town Christmas tree (an enormous magnolia strung with thousands of lights) smoked cigars and sang Christmas carols. The police officer doing his nightly rounds was quite bewildered by the “singing Christmas tree.” We tried to get him to join us, but he gently sent us on our way. Growing up in a small town was really quite fun!

My junior and senior English teacher also added his own experience to the list (I’m mad I didn’t think of it to start with!).

True or False: As a junior in high school, Cookie Eaddy once slapped a classmate, the superintendent’s son, so hard that he carried the imprint of her hand for 3 full class periods. Yep, true! We were in the middle of English class, and the aforementioned miscreant had been baiting me for a few hours. I calmly stood up and walked over (picture the scene, everyone is seated and engaged in study) and walloped him, and I turned around and returned to my seat. My teacher, my own inspiration for becoming an English teacher, paused to watch the whole thing and promptly resumed the lesson, knowing that said fellow surely deserved his beatdown. He did. And in my defense, I remember getting in a scrap with the same gentleman in fifth grade, where he gave me a bloody nose. We’re even now, I guess.

So, there you have it! I so enjoyed bustin’ out some oldies but goodies with ya. Tomorrow’s date night, so maybe Chris and I’ll go splash in the Flo-town fountain by Olive Garden just for ole times sake…